I was reminded of a conversation I had with DH a few months back... I don't know what brought this to my mind today, but it was there... and it was on the forefront.
A few months ago, I told DH "God doesn't know how I feel about this... He had a Son. He never knew what it was like to long for a baby and not be able to have one. He doesn't know." I wasn't trying to be disrespectful, I was just expressing something I had been thinking about. And I think God understand when we have these kinds of doubts and questions.
Today, it hit me... Jesus never had a son. I don't know if he LONGED for one, but he never had one. Maybe he does understand what it is like... I know that he knows what it is like to be hungry, afraid, angry, homeless, lonely, abandoned... I believe this is one of the reasons he became a man, so that he could feel what we feel. So when we come to him asking, pleading, he could say, "I have been where you are, I know how your feel." (which is why it bothered me so much that he didn't understand IF). Jesus never talks about a desire for children. But I wonder if he desired to father a child... if maybe that desire was something that, because he was God, and because it interfered with his ministry, he couldn't realize.
I don't know... I could be way off. But it does make me feel a little better about how God feels about my IF journey... one more thing about God that makes him able to understand and love me even more.
God understands and knows all aspects of our lives even if He didn't personally experience it in the way we experience things. God has never had cancer but He knows what it is like because He knows us and He knows our hearts. God is in us and "experiences" everything we experience.
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